Author's Note: This is a poem I did on a sculpture from the Art Museum. I really liked the piece and it inspired me. In the end of this poem the soldier is trying to find anything he can hold on to, so he can stay alive. He's fighting for his life. PLEASE leave comments because I'm more than happy to change it. This format is an experiment so let me know what you think.
Fighting for Life,
Fighting for Death,
Fighting for Greece,
Fighting for Sparta,
Grit and dust,
Sweat and tears,
Blood and spit,
Sword and shield,
Blood flowing,
Head pounding,
Heart beating,
Hands trembling,
Reaching,
Grabbing,
Stabbing,
Killing,
Falling,
Laying,
Bleeding,
Dying,
Reaching for a sword,
Reaching for a shield,
Reaching for a helmet,
Reaching for a hope,
Failing.
This was a great poem Derek! I loved the repetition, and the format. I don't think you should change it, because it had a cool affect when reading it. What sculpture or painting was this?
ReplyDeleteThis was the white marble guy who was laying on the ground. This sword and shield were right in front of him and he had a big gash in his side. It was titled "The Last Spartan".
ReplyDeleteI really liked that poem, the repetition made it really interesting. And also, like Sammy said, the format was really cool. Nice job!
ReplyDeleteWow Derek that was really good. That format is really cool also, the repetition made the poem sound really cool. I didn't really like how it ended because it kind of left you with a depressing feeling, but hey I guess it's my fault for reading it. Really awesome poem Derek!
ReplyDeleteI think the greatest feature of this poem is that the way it's written makes the reader speed up as they read it, then slow down by the time you reach the last line. I'm not sure if it's just me, or if it was the format of your blog, but once I got to that last block, I didn't see the last line for a few seconds. Like I said, I'm not sure if that's the intended effect, but it was cool none the less. The only thing I would change, is would change reaching to reach, but then again, I'm not the writer.
ReplyDeleteWow! That was a really good poem. I liked the format of sorts that you put the poem into it really added a good effect.
ReplyDelete